Sleepycatz

A quick observation

Living in a large city has many advantages: number of cultural outlets, numerous resturants, and a large amount of general diversity. Unfortunately, the quality of automobile traffic isn’t one of them. Due to my job, I am required to drive to and from work on a daily basis, rather then using public transportation. Here in Chicago, this often means the journey home at night is akin to that of Odysseus’. A few days ago, however, I realized that motoring Chicagoans seem to become more feline as the amount of traffic increases. Let me explain.

Much like large numbers of cats, driving Chicagoans cannot be herded or controled by any rule, law, or device. From outside observation they appear chatoic and random in their movements. Yet, we sense there is some pattern or logic at work; a hint of which is only available to us as rationale beings. The typical mortist tends to slow and then sleep, and without warning pounce forward, lurching the body of their vehicle back and forth — contorting the springs and metal. As with many house cats, Chicago drivers seem quite fickel. At one moment they will politely let you merge or turn, and then a second later will strike at you — clawing with sharp horns or obscene gestures. Finaly, these drivers seem inordinately fond of shiny objects. A crumpled piece of metal or a flashing light will cause them slow or stop. Mezmorized by the play of light against a reflective surface, drivers will approch these objects cautiously, trepidously, as if they are stalking the object of their desire. Fearful they might alert the dancing lights to their presence, motorists inch forward bit by bit, preparing to attack their prey. When they finaly arrive at the object they realize that it is not what they hoped it was at all, but instead a simulation, a ghost, and they move forward again at a regular rate.

Traffic analysts in Chicago, and no doubt in other large cities, have tried to envision the chaos that would errupt should a disaster befall a major thoroughfare. They have looked at floods, earthquakes, explosions, chemical toxins, etc. as causes for concern. But I wonder if they have taken into account the damage that could be caused by a nefarious person or group armed only with several large balls of tin foil.

This entry was posted by steve on Friday, February 21st, 2003 at 6:20 pm and is filed under Misc. Ramblings. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.